Ladyloafer has always wanted to travel but frankly I’m too lazy. Also it’s not like it used to be right? All security checks and cattle class travel. Ladyloafer dreams of the days of glorious travel, when ladies wore gloves and waving your passport in the air exclaiming ‘I’m British, let me through’ would’ve worked!
So let us take a world tour via the lazy medium of beautiful vintage travel posters.
We’ll start in Ireland. A place so wonderful you’ll need a magnifying glass to find it on your globe.
OK, now to Europe. That’s a rather inconvenient travel guide they’ve got there. Why don’t they just use their i-phones eh?
So lets start north. Sweden, where the girls are really horny. (‘cos she’s blowing a giant horn, no? Hmm, hmm…I’ll get me coat). And it’s a Mecca too. Not like actual Mecca though?
We’ll popover to the ‘USSR’ for some animal torture. Or we could not do animal murder and go to an art gallery or something.
But still, USSR. How retro.
across on the ferry…
…to Austria. (Wait, does Austria even have a coast? I think my map is broken)
But look at that death-defying cable car! Awesome.
Even better if serenaded by a roaming oompa band!
There’s pristine snow.
And then we’ll take the train to Switzerland.
Then onto France and Portugal. Where even the people are made of sunshine.
This world tour is so exciting! Time to leave Europe and head for the middle east. How about the oh so sophisticated and trendy and above all safe* Syria, Lebanon and Palestine?
We’ll head east now, to ‘The Orient’. Wow that sounds so exotic, and the people there look just like Fisher-Price minifigs, no?
India. Looks beautiful…
…and Netherlands India…erm, what now?
Stop by the Great Barrier Reef in Australia. Because, tropical fishies.
Then back to ‘The Orient’ for Japan. Although it looks a bit dizzying.
From the east, back to the west and the glaciers of Alaska. If they haven’t melted yet.
Down to Mexico, to warm up by an exploding volcano. Hmm, is this a good idea?
And finally, we end our world tour in downtown Chicago. Which I think may have its own volcano looking at those clouds….
There we have it. A world tour through vintage posters, without none of that actual getting up off the sofa to travel. It’s the loafing way people!
Usual disclaimer, none of these pictures are mine, I think I got them from Buzzfeed.
*Also, I’m sure the actual people of the middle east are mostly lovely, just like everywhere, no offense intended. In fact one day, if the warmongers of the world give it a rest I’d love to actually visit these places.